we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
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