whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
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