i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
Randomize
