Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
Randomize
