I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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