i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
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