I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize
