sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
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Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize