I called you to phone bone last night, but you were out with your boring friends playing video games
Tried to buy Xanax from my boss last night. Wrong Mike.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
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