I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
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