spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
Randomize