And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
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