You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
Randomize