spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
