He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize