Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
I just sucked dick on a ferry
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
Randomize
