This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
Randomize
