in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
I've discovered the best way to avoid rehab is to not fuck fat chicks when your drunk, therefore delaying regrets and rock bottom
your the Dr. Phil in my life
Today is an unchanging day
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize
