Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
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