I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
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