If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day ππ#pensacolaproblems
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
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