So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
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its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
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things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
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