you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
Randomize
