the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
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