Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize
