apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
My pussy is not your playground.
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
Randomize
