I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
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