even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
Randomize
