i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
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