If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Randomize
