I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
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