I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
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