just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
Randomize
