I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
Randomize
