Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
Randomize
