I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
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