I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
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