we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
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