no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sitting in bed reading a porn novel off my phone and accidentally just made Siri start reading the most graphic part aloud. FUN FIRST NIGHT WITH THE NEW ROOMIE.
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
Randomize