If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize