Whod you bang
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up hungover and reached for a glass of water only to realize too late that it was vodka sprite with my splooge in it.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize