Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
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