just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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