Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
Randomize