i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
Rumble strips road head = magical
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
Randomize
