Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
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