there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
Randomize
