Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
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