God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
Sorry I threw up all over your Lyft.
It's ok I woke up next to a dumpster.
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