If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Randomize