It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
Woke up to a bottle of gatorade and a packet of saltine crackers tied to underwear hanging from my ceiling fan, along with 3 advil stuck to a piece of duct tape and a note saying "have a happy hangover- <3 you/me"
Drunk you is pretty stunner.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
Last night a drunk chick tried to lick me. If you are trying to lick the zombies, you are too drunk for the haunted house.
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize